Well, I had to make it to school today just so I could park in my damn senior/staff parking spot, which was *only* for today, and to hell if five-foot water, driving rain, and yelling policemen with flares would stop me. So, basically, I owe getting to school to my boss/newly dubbed new tech leader man either way, because he inspired me by giving me a parking spot for the day and also he was the one who told me the name of Western Avenue, which is the road I took to school. This last sentence does not actually do the two and a half hours in the car I spent today justice, so, for your convenience, here’s a small screenplay.
RACHAEL: (singing along to les mis, but slowly getting quieter and angrier as time passes):Okay, all those exits are blocked, and THAT one has a submerged vehicle in it, sooooo we’ll save it for last. WHOS’ UP FOR NORTH CHICAGO??!
SISTER: We’re both gonna die.
RACHAEL: (laughing maniacally) Nonsense!!! Who said we’re gonna die?? A couple super deep puddles that come up to the bottom of my windows couldn’t possibly hurt anything!! And all the ambulances must be on their way to tea parties or something. And the fogged up windshield is…pretty?
SISTER:…(in shock) We’re gonna die. (Sit in silence, listening to now out of place Les Mis music)
RACHAEL: (thirty minutes later)(sweat drop rolls slowly down side of face)(singing): a…little fall of rain…can…hardly…hurt us now…..?
SISTER: Thassit. I’M ASKING FOR DIRECTIONS
RACHAEL: NOOO IMMA RESPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT
(After phone call made to very angry mom, with profanities on top)
MOM: RACHAEL PARK THE CAR.
RACHAEL(dramatic hair fling) BUT MOMMY NO! I CAN’T!! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET ANYWHERE????!
SISTER: We’re all gonna die.
RACHAEL: (cackling with hysterical laughter) OH EM JEEZUS I KNOW THIS ROAD!!!! *les mis tune* I’VE SEEN THIS FACE BEFORE….
WESTERN AVENUE: After all the time you spent driving through Lake Bluff, North Chicago, and the Back Roads, I am conveniently not flooded!!!
MOM: (deep menacing voice) YOU’LL NEVER MAKE IT, YOU FAILURE!!! HAAHAHAHAA
RACHAEL: (brandishing Super Driver cape and singing Les Mis still) I KNOW MY WAAAAY ARROUUUNNNDD!!!!! *reaches school, egg-rolls in and collapses in theatre*
So yeah. That was generally part of a day that didn’t get much better. Driving was probably the highlight.
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